Performance Consulting and Therapy
Virtual performance consulting across the globe
Teletherapy for athletes in Virginia, North Carolina, Florida, Utah, and Arizona
How should I decide between performance consultation or therapy?
Check out the differences between consulting and coaching in the table below. Contact me at kelly@athletementalwellness.com for further clarification.
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| Consulting/Coaching | Therapy |
| You may live anywhere | You must live in a state in which I am licensed to provide therapy (currently NC, VA, FL, UT, AZ) |
| You may NOT use insurance to pay for it | You may use out-of-network insurance benefits to pay for therapy. (You pay me directly and may be reimbursed by your insurance company) |
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Diagnosing is beyond the scope of consulting/coaching services |
You will receive a diagnosis in order for treatment to be covered by your insurance |
| Services can include consulting and coaching related to non-clinical issues (symptoms that fall below the criteria for a clinical diagnosis). For example, stress management, goal setting, communication skills, problem-solving, and self-perception. | Services can include everything that can be covered in consulting and coaching PLUS treatment for clinical issues such as eating disorders, obsessive-compulsive disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, major depressive disorder, self-harm, suicidal thoughts, etc. |
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Licensure and regulatory boards protect the public to ensure that mental health professionals have appropriate education and follow ethical codes. There is a governing body you can report to if you perceive malpractice that will ensure due process. Providing therapy requires a master’s degree or higher, a passing score on a licensure exam, and a state license in order to practice. |
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The issue you want help with is specific to one setting (i.e. stress about sports performance). It is okay if you also experience general anxiety, but we will not address that in consultation. You will need to see a mental health provider for that. |
The issue you want help with is pervasive across settings (i.e. general anxiety at school, home, work, in relationships) |
Consultation or Therapy for Sports-Related Issues
If you’re doing pretty well overall but feel that learning some cognitive-behavioral sports psychology techniques could give you that extra edge, you’re right. If you’re putting in 15-20+ hours a week (or 60-80 hours a month) to get your body in peak physical condition to compete, it’s probably worth your time and money to spend an hour or two a month on giving your mind the competitive advantage it deserves.
Additionally, most athletes find themselves in a rut at one point or another whether it’s related to something new you’re implementing in training, coming back from an injury, or a relationship issue with your coach. A few sessions of consultation or therapy can reduce your stress and get you back on track quickly so you can make the most of your training time and enjoy your life more.
I use tools and techniques from Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), and Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) to help you fine-tune your mental skills. I also use a relational and systemic approach to conceptualize the issues you face and help you gain insight into how your circumstances are affecting you.
Therapy for Mental Health Issues
Athletes are often excellent performers who appear to have it all together, but you’re not a robot, and you’re not perfect. Just because you might be a little stronger, faster, or more flexible than the average person doesn’t mean you automatically have the emotional skills to handle difficult life situations. If you’re an athlete who is killing it on the field and competing like a stud at the track, and then thinking about killing yourself when you get back home, you are not alone, and you can feel better.
Symptoms of depression and anxiety can not only happen to athletes, but can often be exacerbated by situational factors related to your sport. On the other hand, personal issues that seem unrelated like trauma or abuse can indirectly cause your athletic performance to suffer.
Working with a therapist who has expertise and understanding of the demands of competitive athetics can be an important factor in feeling understood. Pursuing therapy as an athlete does not just have to be about learning mental toughness techniques, though that can certainly help. Reducing your overall stressors in life and learning effective coping and communication skills can improve your mental health and your athletic performance.
Areas of Expertise
Sports Psychology
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Getting your body in top shape is only half the battle. Being mentally tough and learning cognitive-behavioral strategies to keep you at the top of your game can give you a competitive edge and keep your sport fun. Techniques to reduce anxiety such as relaxation strategies, visualization, replacing negative thoughts, and problem-solving are all important skills to help you achieve peak performance.
Body Positivity
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You don’t have to have a full-blown eating disorder or extreme body dysmorphia (obsessive focus on perceived flaws) to experience body dissatisfaction or an unhealthy relationship with food. Disordered eating and negative mental health symptoms like depression and suicidality go hand in hand and it’s important to seek professional treatment early. Your coach may mean well, but chances are, if your coach is giving you advice on dieting, this may be having a negative impact on your mental health, especially if you’re female.
Perfectionism
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Feeling like you have to be perfect all the time and it’s counterpoint, avoiding things due to fear of failure, can seriously increase stress and limit your opportunities in life. Learning to change your thinking can make life more enjoyable and can make you more successful at your sport. Finding the balance between pushing yourself to the limits of your ability and being happy with what you have achieved can be difficult to accomplish.
Identity Issues
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Defining yourself as an athlete is an important identity for most people who love their sport. We all have other factors to our identity that we may not have fully explored, and processing the intersectionality of race, gender, sexuality, religion, or being a parent is an important component of solid mental health for many people. Additionally, when you transition away from athletics defining your life, such as at the end of a successful collegiate career, it can be difficult to figure out who you are beyond just being a great athlete.
Life Transitions
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Athletic transitions like injuries, moving up to a higher level of competition, trying a new position or event, or retiring from your sport can all be difficult to navigate. Other life transitions like moving to a new city, a breakup, becoming a parent, or dealing with grief can affect your personal and athletic well-being.
Relationship Issues
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Whether you feel like your parents or your coaches are putting too much pressure on you, or it just seems hard to communicate effectively with them, relationships with people who care about your athletic performance can be a source of stress. Romantic relationships that are not going well also negatively affect overall wellbeing and sports performance.
About Female Athletes
Young female athletes in individual sports like gymnastics, dance, track and field, cross country, swimming, diving, or ice skating are at a particularly high risk for mental health issues related to perfectionism. In these sports, all the pressure is put squarely on the athlete’s shoulders. Many individual female sports emphasize thinness as an essential element to success, and dieting or disordered eating can wreak havoc on mental health.
I help female athletes work through body image issues or disordered eating using the Intuitive Eating and Health at Every Size models. For serious eating disorders, I require a doctor and nutritionist to be part of the treatment team.
Teen girls today are reporting higher levels of depression and anxiety and put immense pressure on themselves to succeed academically and athletically. In a generally positive era of female empowerment, young women can feel like they have to be able to do it all, with smiles on their faces.
As they age, female athletes who “retire” or move on from high school, college, or post-collegiate sports may particularly struggle with body image issues and identity issues during the significant life transitions of pregnancy and motherhood. How to hold onto the athlete identity while changing diapers and losing sleep is an important issue to work through.
FAQs about Therapy
How often will I come to consultation or therapy?
That depends on the urgency you feel and your finances. Clients seeking therapy most commonly come every other week. Some people whose lives feel more turbulent come weekly. Others who have been with me for a while but still feel that an ongoing therapeutic relationship is helpful come once a month or less. The frequency with which we meet for performance consulting may be more related to if you are in or out of season, how busy you are, and how much follow-up you feel like you need as you work on your goals.
Can I bring my parent/partner/coach/teammate to my consultation or therapy appointment?
Yes. The primary focus will be on you and the issues and goals that you present, but sometimes having a supportive person with you can make the process seem less intimidating. If your relationship with someone is part of the problem, we can talk about whether and how to include them at some point in future sessions.
Will you give me homework to work on between sessions?
That’s entirely up to you. Some people are task and efficiency-oriented and want to get as much done, as quickly as possible. For others, just showing up to the appointment is difficult enough and they don’t want to have to do much in between. I like to read and I may recommend a book to you, but if you’re not a reader and you feel like that’s what you’re paying me the big bucks for–to read and summarize in session, that works too. I’ll follow your lead.
I'm not an athlete, but you seem like a good therapist and consultant, can I still work with you?
Absolutely. I work with plenty of clients who are not athletes. To learn more about my general practice, visit my website for Aspire Family Counseling. You can book consultation or therapy services through my client portal on either website. They lead to the same place.